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Kagan
Kagan
is the main villain in the 2005 Uwe Boll film, Bloodrayne. He is played by Ben Kingsley in the original Ben Kingsley Paycheck role.

FactsEdit

  • We say he's the main villain, but that's only because the script says so
  • Looks like he's half-asleep the entire movie
  • No, seriously--in all but three scenes, he is doing nothing but talking while sitting in his chair and fighting off narcolepsy
  • Wears a wig that is worse than any other in the Tiradesverse except maybe Ayane's or Joe Marshall's
  • Lives in a Minecraft castle
  • Is clearly a shopper at the clearance bin of Finer Cronies and Goons, Inc.
  • Calls his daughter, Rayne, an "ungrateful bitch"
  • Has the most boring and plodding sword fight since House of the Dead with Rayne
  • Despite the movie telling us repeatedly that he is the most powerful vampire on Earth, he gets killed by a goddamned crossbow bolt that Rayne shoves into his chest while she is being impaled with a sword

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