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CadeYeager

Cade Yeager is the main human protagonist? in the 2014 Michael Bay film, Transformers: Age of Extinction. He is played by Mark Wahlberg.

FactsEdit

  • Is an all-American, everyman inventor, and a really shitty one at that
  • An even shittier and more useless father than he is an inventor, which is saying fucktons
  • Has to remind you every twenty minutes or so that he is an inventor
  • Is a colossal asshole who was lawfully evicted from his house and attacks a real estate agent with a baseball bat, steals power from his neighbors' houses, smothers his daughter on an absurd level, and refuses to accept the reality that he is dead broke and should get a real job
  • Wahlberg tries very early on to keep a Texan accent, but after about the 4-minute mark, he constantly slips out of it and ultimately stays in his native Bostonian accent
  • Finds the broken down and deactivated Optimus Prime in an old theatre in his hometown
  • How Optimus wound up there and how no one noticed he was there is never explained
  • Flat out says he "owns" his friend, Lucas Flannery
  • Might actually be Max Connor grown up
  • Has a major problem with 20-year-old Shane Dyson dating his daughter (and rightfully fucking so), but around the 2-hour mark of the movie, he completely changes his mind and likes the asshole, and tells him to take care of her if he dies
  • Calls Shane "Lucky Charms" throughout the whole movie, which is highly offensive to Irish people, but this is a Michael Bay movie, so you know what you're in for
  • Randomly finds a human-sized sword-gun (apparently with infinite ammo) in Lockdown's ship and uses it for the last third of the movie
  • Somehow has Joshua Joyce's personal cell phone number with no explanation as to how he got it
  • Appeals to Joyce to not give the The Seed to Galvatron because he is an inventor like him, which means he has a conscience
  • WHAT?!?!?!?!?!
  • Helps Optimus Prime destroy Lockdown

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